AMOR FEY ESPERANZA

I find that many women have given up hope that they can ever be released from their emotional and spiritual prisons. But over and over again, I have seen a light kindled in their eyes when they discover that the “abundant life” God promised truly can be a reality, regardless of their circumstances. The purpose of this booklet is to help us discover the path to that abundant life and to examine our lives in light of God’s design and plan. Before you go any further, I feel I should warn you that what you are about to read is not politically correct. It flies in the face of what we have been taught as 21 st-century, “liberated” women. It is contrary to our natural instincts. It will never be the majority position and is likely to make some women uncomfortable. But I can assure you that it is the only path to true joy, peace, and fulfillment as a woman. You see, God made us, He loves us, and we can only be whole when we function according to His design for our lives. If your heart longs to be free to fulfill the purpose for which you were created, I invite you to join me in seeking to know the heart and ways of God. I am praying that God will orchestrate a counter-revolution in our day—a quiet revolution of women who are willing to pattern their lives, not after the world, but after the Word of God. I am convinced that the influence of an army of godly women will be incalculable—in our homes, our churches, and our culture. Will you be one of those women? “It is time for women of biblical faith to reclaim our territory. We know the Designer. We have His instruction manual. If we don’t display the Divine design of His female creation, no one will. But if we do, it will be a profound testimony to a watching, needy world.” –Susan Hunt The verses on the following pages express God’s heart for women. Together they provide a biblical portrait of a godly woman. The questions that follow each verse are designed to help evaluate how well you are applying the Word in your daily walk. The point is not to answer a simple “yes” or “no” to each question, but rather to use the questions as a basis for personal meditation, application, and response to the Lord. Some of these verses are directed specifically to married women. Others apply more broadly to all women. Regardless of your marital status, ask God to open your heart and to help you see areas where He wants to mold you and make you a woman after His own heart. To get the most out of this exercise, you may want to focus on one verse each day, asking God to show you how your life measures up to that particular aspect of His design. As you work through this section, highlight three or four verses that reveal specific areas of need in your life, so you can memorize them and engraft them into your heart and life. 1. “The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’” (Genesis 2:18). Have I embraced my God-created design to be a helper to the man? Am I willing to sacrifice my own ambitions and aspirations in order to fulfill my primary role and calling as a helper to my husband? Am I providing companionship for my husband? Am I completing and complementing my husband , rather than competing with him? How could I better help my husband fulfill God’s purpose for his life? What kinds of words, actions, and attitudes on my part will help Christian men around me become all God wants them to be? Am I promoting healthy, godly marriages in the ways I relate and respond to other women’s husbands? Am I maintaining the kinds of boundaries in my relationships with men that promote biblical standards of purity? Do I recognize and accept that God created the woman to complete, complement, and help the man? Is my life helping and blessing the men around me in ways that promote holiness and godliness? In the way I talk to and about men, do I show their God-created worth and value? Am I a responder (rather than an initiator) in my relationships with men? Do I make it easy for men to fulfill their God-given calling to lead in the home, the church, and society? Do I respond to men in ways that communicate appropriate respect and affirmation of their manhood? Do I seek to protect and preserve God-created distinctions between men and women in the way that I conduct myself, in my dress, and in my various roles as a woman? 4. “And Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living” (Genesis 3:20, kjv ). Do I recognize and accept my God-created calling to be a bearer and nurturer of life? Do I consider it a high and holy calling to be a “mother,” whether of physical or spiritual children? Am I actively involved in bearing and nurturing life? 5. “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment … . Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit” (1 Peter 3:3–4). Do others see in me an inner radiance and beauty that are the result of a grateful, yielded, trusting spirit? Do I focus more time and effort on cultivating inner spiritual beauty than I do on matters of external beauty? 6. “This is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful” (1 Peter 3:5). Am I more concerned about being holy than about being happy? Am I placing my hope and trust in God rather than in people? 7. “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised” (Proverbs 31:30). Am I more concerned about cultivating my relationship with the Lord than about being fashionable, stylish, or physically attractive? Do I live in the constant, conscious recognition of the presence of God? Do I desire to please God more than I desire the approval of others? 8. “I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety” (1 Timothy 2:9). Do I dress modestly? Do my clothing styles encourage men to think pure thoughts, rather than stimulating them to have sensual thoughts or desires? Do I dress in such a way as to draw attention to the heart and spirit of Jesus within me, rather than to my physical body? 9. “… not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes” (1 Timothy 2:9). Do I avoid extreme or excessive fashions (hair, clothing, jewelry, make-up) that could call attention to myself or cause people to be distracted from focusing on the Lord? Do I avoid extravagant jewelry or clothing that could flaunt my wealth or cause others to be envious? Do my wardrobe and outward appearance portray a spirit of moderation, sobriety, purity, and reverence? 10. “All the city … doth know that thou art a virtuous woman” (Ruth 3:11, kjv ). Do I have a reputation for being a woman of moral virtue and godly character? Do I keep myself pure from all influences that could defile my heart, thoughts, or actions? 11. “She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness” (Proverbs 31:26, kjv ). Do I bless my family, friends, and acquaintances by speaking words that are kind and wise? Do I study and meditate on the Word of God so that I can know how to speak wise words? Am I able to point people to specific Scriptures that apply to their lives and needs? 12. “Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone” (Proverbs 25:15). Am I willing to wait quietly for God to change the heart of an authority that I feel is wrong, rather than pushing, manipulating, or nagging? Do I seek to influence others by means of gentle words, rather than controlling or intimidating them with harsh words? 13. “A woman should learn in quietness and full submission” (1 Timothy 2:11). Do I have a teachable spirit? Do I receive instruction with a meek, obedient spirit? 14. “It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman” (Proverbs 21:19, kjv ). Does my spirit make it easy for those I live or work with to be around me? Do I frustrate others or make them want to stay away from me because of an argumentative or angry spirit?